I Validate Myself

For much of my life, I unconsciously reached outward for approval—treating other people’s recognition like it was oxygen, necessary for survival. I’d pepper my words with “ya know?” and “what do you think?” not just out of politeness, but from a deeper need to feel seen, heard, and validated. But the truth I’ve come to realize is this: seeking worth outside of myself is like chasing clouds for water—it’ll never truly quench the thirst.

This poem is a meditation on that awakening. It’s a letting go of the old conditioning that says my value must be measured by someone else’s reaction. It’s a call to come home to myself—to the quiet place where my love, my pride, my sense of "enoughness" already lives. When I validate myself, I no longer beg for permission to shine. I just shine. This is my offering, lit from within.

I Validate Myself:

All through my life, I sought the sign—

A glance, a nod, a warm “well done.”

As if my worth could be defined

By someone else beneath the sun.

“Look what I did!” I’d cry with pride,

A child who shaped stars in the sand.

Then wait to see if they'd decide

My joy was something they could stand.

I’d paint, then pause for someone’s voice

To tell me if the tones were true.

Their silence left me with no choice—

I doubted what I thought I knew.

But here’s the truth, both deep and clear:

To chase the crowd is to betray

The spark within—the one sincere,

That doesn’t ask, but lights the way.

When praise is gone and night is long,

And silence sings its solemn tune,

I will not twist to prove I’m strong—

The sun still warms a quiet room.

So now I ask, not them—but me:

Do I feel proud of what I’ve shown?

Does joy arise and set me free,

Without the need to be well-known?

No baited breath, no wishful cast,

No hope for strangers to agree.

I plant my truth, release the past,

And let what comes, come naturally.

Their gaze is theirs, their love, their weight—

Not mine to claim, or fear, or chase.

What’s mine is love I cultivate,

A quiet strength, a rooted grace.

Let doubt be still, let judgment stray,

Let all the noise drift off the shelf.

No matter what the world may say—

I validate myself.